Celebrate Life, Celebrate Death

The cycle of life and death continues. Celebrate death as you celebrate life. Death is not the end; it is merely a farewell. Birth and death are two fundamental truths of life. One who is born has to die. What truly matters is not how long you live, but how well you live. Live every moment as if there is no tomorrow. In other words, celebrate life and accept death gracefully as it comes. “Never say die” should be the mantra of life.

Gurudev Rabindranath Tagore beautifully expressed this eternal truth. He believed that we are all bound in the cycle of life, consisting of birth and death, moving from one life to another. Death, he felt, is just one event in this continuum, as the soul is transcendental and indestructible. He wrote:

“Death is not extinguishing the light; it is only putting off the lamp because dawn has come.”

Tagore’s acceptance of death resonates when he says:

“And because I love this life, I know I shall love death as well.”

In a touching metaphor, he personifies death as a mother:

“Kissing the fading day with a whisper, death says, ‘I am your mother. From me, you will get another birth.’”

The Message of Anand

This profound message is wonderfully depicted in Hrishikesh Mukherjee’s classic 1971 film, Anand, my all-time favourite. Rajesh Khanna delivered the performance of a lifetime, portraying Anand, a terminally ill cancer patient. Though he knows he has only a few months left, Anand continues to spread joy, embodying a fearless spirit with his infectious smile and boundless energy.

His philosophy of life is summed up in one memorable line:

“Zindagi badi honi chahiye, lambi nahin.”("Life should be big, not long.")

The climax of Anand lingers in memory—poignant and profound. As Anand lies on his deathbed, awaiting a final goodbye from his friend Bhaskar (played by Amitabh Bachchan), he musters a final “Babu Moshai.” When Bhaskar returns, he finds Anand has passed away. His grief is met with the playback of a tape, where Anand’s voice echoes in the room:

“Babumoshai, zindagi aur maut uparwale ke haath hai, jahanpanah. Usse na toh aap badal sakte hain na main. Hum sab toh rangmanch ki kathputliyan hain jinki dor uparwale ki ungliyon mein bandhi hain. Kab, kaun, kaise uthega yeh koi nahi bata sakta hai. Ha, ha, ha.”

Translation: Life and death are in the hands of the Almighty. Neither you nor I can change it. We are all puppets on the stage, with our strings controlled by Him. When, where, and how the curtain falls, no one knows.

Anand may die, but his spirit lives on. People like him never truly leave; they remain alive in the hearts and memories of those they touch.

Mourning or Celebration?

So how should we say goodbye to a free soul like Anand?

Death is inevitable, and grief is natural. It leaves behind tear-stained, grief-stricken family members and friends, making life seem incomplete. Traditionally, we follow rituals such as Chautha or Tehrveen, mourning periods lasting four or thirteen days. A preacher speaks of karma and reminds us of the fleeting nature of life. Tea and snacks are served as people gather, often engaging in casual conversations or even idle gossip, sometimes forgetting the solemnity of the occasion.

But occasionally, one witnesses a more heartfelt tribute.

A Different Farewell

My wife and I recently attended a ceremony that felt more like a true farewell. Instead of guests sitting uncomfortably on the floor, chairs with white covers were arranged. A flower-decked dais displayed the photograph of the departed in one corner.

For the next two hours, a lady singer, accompanied by an orchestra, sang devotional songs, hymns, ghazals, and old melodies cherished by the departed. It was a sincere tribute that brought peace and warmth to everyone present. Meals and refreshments were thoughtfully provided, reflecting care not just for the deceased but for the mourners as well. I felt this was a beautiful and meaningful way to honour a life.

Finding Peace in Tradition

Another place where I have always found serenity during such ceremonies is the Gurudwara. Shabads from the Guru Granth Sahib are continuously chanted by Ragis until the ceremony concludes, filling the space with a spiritual calm.

One farewell that stands out in my memory is that of Colonel V.N. Bhatia, my battery commander in the 91 Mountain Regiment during the 1965 Indo-Pak war at the Khem Karan front—known as the graveyard of American Patton tanks. A daredevil, Colonel Bhatia once drove an abandoned Pakistani tank back to our regiment during the ceasefire.

At his Chautha in Delhi, after the prayer meeting, his son invited us to Dhaulakuan Club for a drink. He asked us to raise a toast to his father, saying, “Colonel Bhatia, a free-spirited man, would have loved this.” It felt like the perfect send-off.

Life and Death: A Matter of Perspective

George Eliot wrote,

“Our dead are never dead to us until we have forgotten them.”

Martin Luther King Jr. believed,

“If a man has not discovered something to die for, he is not fit to live.”

William Shakespeare reminds us,

“Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once.”

It all comes down to perspective—how we choose to view life and death.

The Eternal Cycle

And so, the cycle of life and death continues. Celebrate death as you celebrate life. Death is not the end; it is farewell only.